Main image courtesy of Unicity Healthcare.

Conversations about mental health are constantly stigmatized, and there can be a lot of shame or judgment around struggling with mental illnesses. This is especially true when it comes to discussing masculinity and mental health, as toxic masculinity can make it difficult or even impossible for men to come forward about their mental health problems.

The consequences are deadly: more than 4 times as many men as women die by suicide in the United States, and suicide is the 7th leading cause of death in males. Because it is more socially unacceptable for men to discuss their feelings, men tend to downplay their symptoms, bottle up their emotions, and are less likely to seek help for whatever they may be struggling with. 

June is Men’s Health Month, and it’s important that we start having conversations about men’s mental health too. This means teaching children of all genders about emotional needs, awareness, and communication at an early age, so they’re able to find healthy coping mechanisms and develop skills to manage their emotions. 

Men’s mental health

A commonly held assumption is that women are just more likely than men to have some kind of mental illness, such as depression or anxiety. However, the reality is that many men are discouraged from seeking out treatment for their mental health problems due to societal standards and expectations. 

Symptoms of mental health conditions in men may manifest themselves in more socially acceptable alternatives to sadness, such as anger. These symptoms can include irritability, difficulty concentrating, substance abuse, and suicide ideation. 

Because conversations about mental health tend to center around women, it is important to acknowledge and address the unique barriers to care that exist in male populations, especially in queer men, men of color, and lower-income men. 

Emotional literacy

Emotional literacy is about being able to identify and process emotions in yourself as well as others. Because of the influence that outdated gender norms and roles have on our society, girls are often more likely to be taught about topics related to feelings and emotions. 

Women are commonly viewed as more emotional than men, but this is only because it is more socially acceptable for women to express their emotions. Women tend to be taught from an early age about how to identify and communicate their emotions, while men are often told to “man up” or “thug it out” instead of actually coming to terms with how they are feeling. 

In order to foster emotional literacy in individuals of all genders, it is important that children are taught about how to label their emotions, communicate them to others, and respond to others’ feelings in a healthy, respectful manner. Instead of raising children based on their gender, we should aim to raise emotionally resilient, aware individuals. 

Coping mechanisms 

There are a wide variety of coping mechanisms out there, but some are healthier than others. Men are often encouraged to get their emotions out through violence, while women may be more encouraged to calm down or told that they are overreacting. 

While hitting the gym or going on a quick run can be a great way to let off some steam, it is important to also explore other coping mechanisms, such as journaling, which can allow you to better understand and process emotions. Different coping mechanisms work for different people as well as different emotions, so it is important that people of all genders are educated and aware of the different ways to cope with their feelings. 

Supportive communities

We should aim to foster an environment that is welcoming, inclusive, and accepting of people from all backgrounds, and one that allows everyone’s voices to be heard. This is especially important when it comes to conversations about mental health and masculinity. 

Because of the way in which many boys are raised, they often struggle with communicating their emotions, even with their friends. This can be because they are afraid of ridicule or rejection, or may feel socially isolated or strange. These feelings of guilt and shame around difficult emotions often persist in adult men, who may continue to find it difficult to talk about their feelings or seek help for any symptoms they may be experiencing. 

When men do come forward about how they are feeling, it is important that they are greeted with compassion, understanding, and support. Instead of shaming men for “being weak” or judging them for struggling mentally, take the time to acknowledge the courage that it takes to be honest about your struggles. By taking conversations about men’s mental health seriously, we reduce the stigma around it and can help to make it easier for men to seek treatment, such as going to therapy. 

Men’s mental health resources

This Men’s Health Month, be sure to have conversations about mental health and masculinity. Check in on your male friends and family members, and familiarize yourself with some men’s mental health resources in case you or someone you know ever needs them. Men’s mental health is a topic that desperately needs to be addressed, and you can help make a difference by speaking up about it!